chromosomal-dreams/bikol poem translation: an attempt
Saturday, October 4, 2008It was dark. So dark that the people by the road waiting for a commute were merely silhouettes. One female outline loads the tricycle I was in.
“Breath mints?” She asked, after fumbling in her bag for a packet.
“No, thank you.” I declined, as gracefully as I could manage.
Light intermittently falls on her face, it was still dark outside.
“Wow, you’re really beautiful.” I just had to say.
She mumbles, “Yeah, too bad we’re a pair.”
“What?”
“Too bad there’s two of us, you know, down…down there.” She pointed south.
“You mean– Wh–”
“Yeah.” She admitted with a trace of embarrasment sandwiched by honesty.
“Oh.” Was all I could say. And then, I had to ask: “Ok. just to eliminate this one thing I have in mind, you don’t mean that you have…that you’re carrying your twin somewhere ” and I lift my finger cingularly before me, “inside you?”
She laughs. “No.”
The above is from a dream, this is an almost verbatim account,I shit you not. Weird huh? Maybe I got it from an old House episode where the model had an undeveloped twin brother sending unsolicited brainwaves & hormones through her.
* * *
Another part of this afternoon’s dream: Kids dragging heavy sacks, throwing spoons & forks above our heads. I contemplate cutting the kid’s arm off.
Yep. That’s pretty much it.
* * *
Someone posted Jason Mraz’s latest album: in our shared folder. Only Human reminds of Jamiroquai (whatever happened to him? He of the floor conveyor video, I deemed futuristic those days?) And If it Kills Me calls McCartney (& the rest of the gang) to mind. All in all, a good vibe while at work.
* * *
An English cover for the Bikol poem,Kung Sabihon Kong Dae Na Ako Namomoot, by Nery Noratay, found here.
If I claim I no longer love
If in a gush, an onrush of otherwise soft breeze, you would ask:
“Do you love me?”
I’d smile to the heavens and speak under my breath:
“I am afraid.”
I feel as if I hold command over the oceans,
but your heart feels like a stream narrowed by eroded earth
And if I rushed to you, your banks might break;
your heart might whelm, instead of dance
to my current… So if in the shroud of midnight you would ask:
“Do you love me?”
I’d plant a kiss and in your eye I would say,
“I’m holding it back.”
Maybe in time I’d learn not to speak to you
Of things about love, or life
But until I stand ready to bleed…
Even as silence leisurely kills me;
(I will keep my lips pursed).
Previous Comments
I am proud of the translation. Did justice to the piece.. or is even better????
have a great day!
Posted by nery ronatay at October 16, 2008, 8:08 pm@J.A.: Thank you! & thnx for putting me on your blogroll. I enjoy your posts! I’m spamming your blog site to all the Legazpeños I know.
@nery: Sir! I didn’t know you taught at cas, my supervisor –one of your former students– pointed it out to me. Iba talaga an produkto kan bucas
I’m so honored that you found the translation ok. Great poems, sir. Keep the quills sodden!
ket,
you’re great, I’ll never get tired reading your pieces. I even find your translation better . i’m so proud of you
Posted by fe benito at January 29, 2009, 11:10 pmtita fe! thanks! [this non-fair-skinned is blushing with effort] Hope you won’t dig into some ‘hate posts’ here. hehe… xoxo
Posted by discipletonone at February 5, 2009, 10:08 pm



wow! this is a beautiful translation. i think voltaire is wrong to say that translations can either be graceful or faithful but not both
Posted by J.A. Carizo at October 11, 2008, 4:48 pm