you are Princess Fiona, but NOT the cameron diaz alter ego

This is a hate post so beware furry & fuzzy creatures I am unleashing the Ogre within.

I think as a rule, you wouldn’t want your little brother to have anything to do with a girl who’s unlike you in certain degrees…

And by unlike, I meant:

– she’s OLDER than you;
– she’s more than likely UNEMPLOYED;
– she may be girlfriend-material but she’s the type that metamorphoses into a monster once knocked up;
– she’s one of those types you can picture as a loving (& menacingly protective) wife but NOT a caring mother;
– her facial expression doesn’t spell Ambition or independence;
– she sees ONLY my brother & has zero socializing skills.